FFfAW: What Lies Beyond

Posted on by Louise Bunting

This post is for the Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers (FFfAW) Challenge, run by Priceless Joy. This week’s photo prompt was provided by Dawn M. Miller. Thank you Dawn!  The challenge is that you write a story of 75-175 words inspired by the photo prompt below. I hope you like it.

Photo Prompt: © Dawn M Miller
Photo Prompt: © Dawn M Miller

What Lies Beyond

“For centuries we’ve lived in tyranny!” The voice had been bell-like, an awakening chime over the rally. “We’ve huddled behind city walls, believing their lies, for too long. Are we children to believe in monsters lurking in the wilderness?”

With the passionate words of the protest leader echoing through his mind, Marcus stared excitedly through the broken panel at the forbidden land beyond. The covered walkways that connected the city and outlying compounds had been growing increasingly dilapidated lately but he’d never expected to find a hole large to climb through.

“The ruling council wants to keep us living in fear but it is in the wilderness that we can find our freedom!”

Barely hesitating, he scrambled through and dropped to the ground below.

He didn’t see his attacker – merely felt the impact as it forced him to the ground. Sharp claws tore through flesh. Pain ricocheted, an agonised cry wrenching from his throat.

The smug face of the high-councillor swam into view. “Maybe they’ll believe in monsters now.”

His world faded to black.

Word Count: 175

This story was very hard to write in only 175 words! I’ve written and re-written it five or six times, not to mention edited this final version down from nearly 250 words. It was supposed  to have been posted yesterday but, well – that didn’t happen. I hope you all like it. I also hope it makes sense…

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29 thoughts on “FFfAW: What Lies Beyond”

  2. Excellent Louise! So sad at the end! Marcus was fearless to take the first steps into freedom. How sad that the darn monster had to show up! Great story Louise and thank you for participating in the FFfAW challenge!

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    1. Thanks P.J. I think the monster only showed up because the members of the council wanted it to – if there was even any monster other than the high-councillor himself! I’m glad you enjoyed the read. 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

  4. Good story. I hope you kept all the versions! You never know what you might do with them later … 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Love your site. Lovely banner and great drawings. My wife is a fan and does a lot of colouring so I printed a few out for her. She says thank you!

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  5. Very clever twist at the end there. To me, that symbolises how the real demons are the ones we may come into contact with every day.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m glad you liked it, Francesca. The worst monsters are also the ones who pretend to be acting on your best behalf. Thank you for your insightful comment. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Michael. 🙂 I could easily make a much longer story out of this – it was really hard to write in so few words! I’m glad you enjoyed it.

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  8. The ruling council knows best! Though it may be them who are controlling the monster I guess – it’s hard to give up absolute power, and those who wield it usually need something to keep the “underlings” in check 🙂
    Another great fantasy story!

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    1. Sorry – I couldn’t resist! You never know, he might not be dead. He could be found and healed by a group of people who live outside the city walls, to someday return and expose the ruling council’s machinations… I’m very glad you enjoyed the story (until the end). 🙂

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