This post if for the Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers (FFfAW) Challenge, run by Priceless Joy. This week’s picture was provided by Vanessa Rodriguez. The challenge is that you write a story of 75-175 words inspired by the photo prompt below. I hope you all like it.
Complete
Smiling in satisfaction, Samuel positioned the last figure on the platform. It had taken months of work but his model railway was finally finished.
The day’s last light streamed in through the attic window, lighting the scene with a gentle touch. The sounds of the house drifted to his ears: Freddie and Alex squabbled over toys; Lily warbled nursery rhymes to her dolls; his beloved Jennifer clattered pots in the kitchen. They were sounds he loved to hear.
Flicking a switch, he set the trains in motion.
“Have you boys been in the attic again?” Jennifer’s shouted. Silence briefly fell.
“Nope.”
“Not me!”
“Then why can I hear your father’s trains?”
A moment later Jennifer stormed into the room, Freddie and Alex trailing behind.
“Boys?”
“Still weren’t us, Mum.”
Absently flicking off the trains, Jennifer brushed her fingers over the newly completed station.
It had still been incomplete when he died.
Samuel smiled as Lily toddled into the room. “Daddy!” she chirped happily, looking right at him.
He set the trains back in motion.
Word Count: 175
To check out other entries or to add your own, click on the little blue frog.
An Enchanted Place 
That was creepy and sad and lovely all at once!
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Thank you! That’s exactly what I was going for. 🙂
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Balboa Park? Nice writing!
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I don’t really know where the photo prompt was taken – it’s by Vanessa Rodriguez – but I’ve googled Balboa Park Station and it does look like it could be there. 🙂 I’m glad you enjoyed the story.
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It’s Balboa Park Bart station in SF, I pass through it frequently. 😉
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Yes it was taken on my recent trip to SF. I took it from Oakland Airport.
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I loved that Louise. Daddy’s ghost was there with them. What a lovely story.
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Thank you! I’m glad you enjoyed it. I didn’t think I was going to join in with your challenge this week – I usually do either this or the Friday Fictioneers prompt – but this idea took me before I’d even finished writing yesterday’s story and wouldn’t leave me alone!
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That tickles me. I am so glad you participated! Your story was perfect.
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🙂
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A little eerie but sweet.
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Thank you. 🙂
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This is a magical story, Louise. I loved it! How creative that you pictured a toy train set in an attic when you saw this photo.
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Great job on this prompt. The ending sure was a surprise and certainly sad for all of them.
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Thank you. 🙂 I’m glad you liked it.
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I had to twice-read to believe my eyes. Love and Family from “beyond.” WOW! Stretching mightily, I see. What a story. Touched my heart strings.
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Thank you! I like to try my hand at different genres whenever possible. 🙂
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Great story with a difference!! Loved it!
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Thank you. 🙂 I enjoyed writing it.
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A little scary but cute at the same time. Great story! 🙂
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Thanks. 🙂 I’m glad you like it.
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You’ve captured the magical realism genre quite well with this. It’s believeable at first, then twists to the ghosty/magical side and back and forth. It’s a goal for me to write more like this and I have some short shots. For the Horror Writers Workshp in Transylvania this summer I need to submit a longer short story and I’m thinking along the magical realism lines. So comforting to believe that loved ones are still among us, or not.
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Thank you. I enjoyed writing this one. 🙂 Good luck with your short story – I’ve not written much over 1000 words since I discovered flash fiction and I’m starting to feel the need to write something a little longer!
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